Home Goods Enthusiast Pillows

'All I know is I walked into a Bed, Bath and Beyond place.'

"Ironically, this is the living room."

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"I didn't spark joy."

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"You're welcome."

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

'Welcome to the house warming! The map points out what is furniture and what is sculpture.'

Caveman invents an armchair and his dog sits in it.

Posh Easter Egg

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

"Hedge-fund managers have to have something over their sofas, too."

'Ooh, hey...real hardwood floors!'

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

"We want it to look lived in, but not necessarily by us."

'Did they deliver the new couch today?'

"Okay, lady, your new carpet is installed...you can let your dog back in now."

The Piano Dreams Of Home

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

'It's a coffee-book table.'

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

Realtors: 'We make house calls'.

"Well I have to go, my ride is here."

"The board is going to have to talk to 5-G again."

King Madras

Pea green