Home Goods Enthusiast Gifts

'All I know is I walked into a Bed, Bath and Beyond place.'

"Ironically, this is the living room."

'The plumber said he can't come right now, but promised to put us on his 'wading list'. Cute, huh?'

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"I didn't spark joy."

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

"You're welcome."

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

'Welcome to the house warming! The map points out what is furniture and what is sculpture.'

Caveman invents an armchair and his dog sits in it.

"Hedge-fund managers have to have something over their sofas, too."

"Yes, but I'll know it's a recliner."

Posh Easter Egg

'Ooh, hey...real hardwood floors!'

"Well, do you want to buy this sofa or not? You've been on it for three days!"

"We want it to look lived in, but not necessarily by us."

"Okay, lady, your new carpet is installed...you can let your dog back in now."

Estate Agent - This house that's 'just what we are looking for' is ours

The Piano Dreams Of Home

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

Ok, now the Swedish mouse is just showing off. IKEA maze.

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

'It's a coffee-book table.'

"Connect A2 to B3, insert D3 into E5....I hate flat packs!"

King Madras

"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

'Did they deliver the new couch today?'