Household Manager Gifts

'What haven't I done that I'm going to do?'

"Philip has questioned my stewardship."

Are you online, Nana? Of course! I've been online for decades!

Personal organiser (Mother).

'With a boss, a wife and three teenaged kids, I haven't had much time to worry about international affairs.'

'You look terrible. Why didn't you stay at home?' - 'My wife wants me to paint the kitchen.'

'It's your mother. She wants to know if she can help with the dishes.'

'All the money we saved buying bulk food on sale we blew on this huge freezer!'

'-but don't you remember saying you could do with some help round the house?'

'Because you told me to run the house like a business.'

'The Smythe Residence: Mrs. Smythe presiding.'

'When I said I needed help, this wasn't what I mean. I meant live-in help.'

'What have I made for dinner? A reservation at the restaurant down the road. . .'

'Golf? I'd love to, but Janet won't get off my back about cleaning the basement.'

"I had to skip my workout."

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

Let's get organized

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

'You never compliment me when it's tidy so I figured you wouldn't notice when it's a tip!'

A Day In The Kitchen

"By labeling it, I control it."

'Our Filipino dog's a real treasure.'

"Careful. That house has a taser."

'Your house is spotless, your children are well behaved and dinner was delicious. How do you do it?'

Hassled Mother.

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

"This looks like a job for 'Margarita Man!'"

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

"Let me put on my 'working' head."

"Not tonight, Jon. I have to clean for the cleaning lady."

'This home based business is easy to set up. Everyone knows that women are better at multitasking.'

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'