House Chore Avoider Gifts

"I never rake all my leaves till all of them have fallen."

Kitchen Tetris

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

It's Your Turn to Do the Dishes Tonight!

Washing Line Walker

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

"Harold! Don't forget to get the eggs!"

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

"...I love the smell of an uncut lawn."

"It's your turn to shovel the perch."

"You'll do anything to get out of taking out the garbage."

'It's your night to catch dinner.'

"Sorry Mrs. Tate. There's no cure for Not-Taking-Out-The-Garbage-Itis."

Kid sweeps dirt under his junk on the floor.

"Don't you dare touch that snooze button!"

Why do chicks dig vampires? They're forbidden, immortal. They have unimaginable strength. They visit at night, bringing wisdom and sensuality. And if they don't take out the trash or mow the lawn you can burn them to death with sunlight! Yikes. They can get housework done while I sleep.

"Just empty it."

"We have a lot in common. We both hate homework, vegetables, bedtime, chores, long car trips. . ."

"Uh, it's the funniest thing honey... None of my power tools seem to work! I guess those projects will have to wait..."

"You used the right amount of detergent and fabric softener. The problem is this washing machine isn't for dishes."

"That goes to the dry cleaners."

"They don't look like the tools you'll need to put the kitchen shelves up with!"

'Got'a be done I s'pose.'

No caption. (A woman folding laundry from the dryer is looking at a mouse folding laundry from a mousehole on the side of the dryer).

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

'Mom, how old was I when Dad first hired you to do all this stuff around the house?'

'When he said he wanted to put me on a pedestal, it was only so I could dust the ceiling fan!'

'As the CEO of a large corporation, I don't suppose you'd consider taking out the garbage?'

"It's my "To-Do" list if I ever get the energy..."

"I would be happy to help you with the dishes, Mom, but I'm afraid I'd get water in my phone."

"Not to complain but you promised to mow the lawn."

"Well, it will just have to wait."

"The cat cleaned the birdcage."