Avoiding Chores Gifts

"What? Speak up! I can't hear you! I'm getting outside interference!"

'I couldn't do my term paper because they've never made a movie about Rutherford B. Hayes.'

"I like going to school...and I like coming home from school. It's all the stuff in the middle that gives me trouble."

"By the way, the failing grades you'll be seeing-they won't be virtual."

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

It's Your Turn to Do the Dishes Tonight!

'When played backwards these say terrible things like 'do your homework' and 'clean your room.''

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

"Harold! Don't forget to get the eggs!"

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

'If you want to get some exercise, carry this out to the garbage.'

Billy strip: help with homework.

'I've been doing well in school lately, so I think I'm entitled to some dumbing down.'

"I virtually finished my homework."

The Procrastinatorium.

'BEWARE OF DOG (eats homework)'

'You're lucky! Your teacher never gives you any homework.'

"It's your turn to shovel the perch."

"You'll do anything to get out of taking out the garbage."

"Iron Man! Thank heaven you’ve come!"

Labradoodle/Labradon't-le

"...I love the smell of an uncut lawn."

Who...what...why...when...where...whatever...

Working from Home

'It's your night to catch dinner.'

Why do chicks dig vampires? They're forbidden, immortal. They have unimaginable strength. They visit at night, bringing wisdom and sensuality. And if they don't take out the trash or mow the lawn you can burn them to death with sunlight! Yikes. They can get housework done while I sleep.

Kid sweeps dirt under his junk on the floor.

"Hahahaha! Oh, you are hilarious! Help you with your math homework … hahahaha!"

"Sorry Mrs. Tate. There's no cure for Not-Taking-Out-The-Garbage-Itis."

"Don't you dare touch that snooze button!"

'It's 42 degrees outside, Eddie. Do you still think global warming burned up your homework?'

"No, you can't hire a temp to do your homework."

'I couldn't do my homework -- our electric pencil sharpener broke down.'