House Chore Avoider T-Shirts

"I never rake all my leaves till all of them have fallen."

Kitchen Tetris

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

It's Your Turn to Do the Dishes Tonight!

Washing Line Walker

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

"Harold! Don't forget to get the eggs!"

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

"Mom said mopping up my snow tracks is a good start for my bucket list."

"It's your turn to shovel the perch."

"...I love the smell of an uncut lawn."

"You'll do anything to get out of taking out the garbage."

"Don't you dare touch that snooze button!"

Kid sweeps dirt under his junk on the floor.

"Sorry Mrs. Tate. There's no cure for Not-Taking-Out-The-Garbage-Itis."

'It's your night to catch dinner.'

"Just empty it."

"They don't look like the tools you'll need to put the kitchen shelves up with!"

"Uh, it's the funniest thing honey... None of my power tools seem to work! I guess those projects will have to wait..."

"We have a lot in common. We both hate homework, vegetables, bedtime, chores, long car trips. . ."

"That goes to the dry cleaners."

'Got'a be done I s'pose.'

'Mom, how old was I when Dad first hired you to do all this stuff around the house?'

'He claims to be a recovering workaholic.'

'As the CEO of a large corporation, I don't suppose you'd consider taking out the garbage?'

'When he said he wanted to put me on a pedestal, it was only so I could dust the ceiling fan!'

"I would be happy to help you with the dishes, Mom, but I'm afraid I'd get water in my phone."

"Well, it will just have to wait."

"The cat cleaned the birdcage."

"Unfortunately, my wife knows me like a book. She's a librarian."

"It's my "To-Do" list if I ever get the energy..."

"Not to complain but you promised to mow the lawn."