Hospital Setting Gifts

'And Remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

Celebration in operating theatre.

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

"We're keeping you overnight because the nurses love you!"

'But they told me to take her down to theatre...'

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

'Oh, believe me -- you don't want to hear it in layman's terms!'

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'This is a fine time to leave! What if the doctor delivers the baby while you're out!'

'You'll be able to lead a normal life after the operation -- except, of course, for your enormous medical bills.'

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

"Ugh, we get it - you're in love."

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

"Nurse, when I asked you to make the patient more comfortable I just meant plump up his pillows!"

'I do need your bed, Mr. Davies, for me, I'm shattered after working twenty-six hours non stop.'

'What's holding him up?'

Saline Drip Sommelier.

'Thanks, but I don't expect you to chew my food for me.'

'Oh, well... Accidents will happen.'

STRIP Hambone: Businessman in hospital with his computer

"Please, doc, pull the plug. Not on me...on the TV!"

'It's not easy being fabulous and caretaking.'

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

Mr. Evers specifically asked for a plain coffee, not an espresso.

'I know it's overdue but I've been in Intensive Care.'

'The doctors all tell me that you have great medical insurance. They think your coverage might last through most of the tests that they have scheduled.'

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

"I never imagined I'd be up on my feet this soon."

"You're sick of this? Just try to imagine how we feel."

"The doctor was more lucid today! That's a good sign!"

Doctor receiving advice from patient's mother

'My goodness, how many miricle drugs did they give you?'