Hospital Settings Gifts

'Last year's 'Bring your pet to work day' turned out very well.'

"But the P.R. guy says he's going to be O.K."

'Whoa, you look so cool right now.'

I like a lot of witnesses around.

'Either I've got bad news for you or my watch has stopped...'

'What are you in for?'

Patient Entrance, Neurology Department.

A&E Department: "Take a seat!"

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

"Until the plaster sets, try not to laugh."

"We're keeping you overnight because the nurses love you!"

'But they told me to take her down to theatre...'

"She fell down stairs again, so this is her third hip."

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

'Oh, believe me -- you don't want to hear it in layman's terms!'

'You'll be able to lead a normal life after the operation -- except, of course, for your enormous medical bills.'

'Let me guess...it's contagious!'

'This is a fine time to leave! What if the doctor delivers the baby while you're out!'

'Your master isn't due for release until the first of the month.'

No caption. (Man wearing a cast is in traction. He imagines sheep lining up to jump fence. Sheep also wear casts.)

"Ugh, we get it - you're in love."

Nurse pushing the Grim Reaper out of the Surgery room.

"Nurse, when I asked you to make the patient more comfortable I just meant plump up his pillows!"

'The doctor says he's going to have to give you a few more tests...'

'I do need your bed, Mr. Davies, for me, I'm shattered after working twenty-six hours non stop.'

'What's holding him up?'

Saline Drip Sommelier.

'It's not easy being fabulous and caretaking.'

Mr. Evers specifically asked for a plain coffee, not an espresso.

"Hey, I got you a beautiful orchid to cheer you up until it turns into just a stick protruding from dirt."

STRIP Hambone: Businessman in hospital with his computer

"I can't stay in this hospital bed too long. Everyone will think I'm too old...too fragile...ready for the home. I'm not ready for that!"

'Oh, well... Accidents will happen.'

'The doctors all tell me that you have great medical insurance. They think your coverage might last through most of the tests that they have scheduled.'