Hospital Comedy Admirer Gifts

"Sorry it took so long. The nurses and I had a bet to see how long it would take for you to stick your head out the door and say, 'Hello?'"

"It would be sad if he wasn't so damned cute."

"We're keeping you overnight because the nurses love you!"

"Get me this...get me that...fluff my pillow...I don't feel well...if I wanted to listen to that all day, I wouldn't have left my husband!"

Dracula in a Vampire Hospital getting some extra blood from a Human blood drip

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

'Reflexes seem normal. You kept him waiting over two hours.'

'Will I live Doctor?' 'Yes, but I don't advise it!'

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

An organ flies across the room during an operation - 'Catch it...!'

"Nurse, when I asked you to make the patient more comfortable I just meant plump up his pillows!"

"When was the last time anyone checked on Mr Klink."

"Since he was born today he won't begin daycare until tomorrow."

"Please, doc, pull the plug. Not on me...on the TV!"

'Did you remove my appendix? Yes, both of them.'

'No, I don't think it a cute idea! Get rid of him and turn in your supervisor's uniform!'

"I never imagined I'd be up on my feet this soon."

'I'm afraid it's bad news Mr.Hooper, I've just got the report on your finances.'

'How about a little smile for me. You've outlived my prediction!'

"These are X-Rays of your operation, and this is a selfie I took with your gall bladder."

"Grandmother, what big diastolic numbers you have."

'Yeah, bit how does the stork get into the maternity room?'

"We think we got some good CT scans, but unfortunately they're encrypted and our I.T. guy is on vacation this week."

"It says you need a CT scan and that the azaleas in the corner need to be watered twice daily."

While you're at it, will you sew on my shirt button please?

'And then, just to humor the guy I said 'I need a hug', little thinking that the big gorilla would do just that.'

'It's your four basic food groups.'

'I'm a practical nurse! -- I know better than to listen to doctors!'

"I got my PhD in Nursing just so people would have to call me Doctor."

'Could you stay out of the room for awhile, Nurse? -- Every time you walk in here, his testosterone levels surge.'

Footballer with a broken leg and a ball in his cast.

"If it's nothing serious' why did you put on five pairs of gloves?"

Big slipper.

"Sorry, new style pain killer. It's the cut-backs I'm afraid."

Doctor has the taste for patients urine samples.