Horse Whisperer Wannabe Gifts

"Just remember, we switch back before we get to town."

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Horsekeeping - No. V

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

Children's Parties

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"Quick, start the car!"

'Unbelievable: My cowboy expects me to drop everything and come running when he whistles...'

Braiding a Horse's Tail

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Use the body brush vigorously - he will enjoy it.

Dog Dreams

"I know it’s an issue, and we’re working on it in therapy."

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

"It was years ago, for a nature documentary, and they said it was going to be very artistic."

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

'You know too much!'

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

"I forsee you will have a better chance of winning the lottery than growing your testicles back."

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

'Don't bite it.I have to check Daddy next.'

"If you could just get rid of the split ends, that will be fine."

"That is an outrageous slur."

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

"Looking at you, the moon and beyond, don't you think we could start a blog?"

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

'Humans are so considerate: They put perches like these for us on every one of their houses...'

"This never happened."

"...and that growl has turned many a hunter into vegetarians!"

'The forest is so dark and gloomy: It's nice to reach the emergence and get a bit of sunshine...'

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

"Watch out, Simone's hangry - her stomach AND her throat are growling."

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

"Do you like it better when I go to the F or the Dm?"

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"