Horse Humor Appreciator Gifts

MAGAA

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

'If Earwigs looked like baby seals:'

Lactose Intolerant

"You should be sniffed, and often, by someone who knows how."

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

"I was almost that last year."

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

Cat and mouse

"Say hello to my little friend."

Excuse me.. Are you Dog Friendly?

You complete me!

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

Ostrich Curoisities

"Aaaaugh! It's the Zombie Alpacalypse!"

Mouse with a cat cake.

Giraffe Rollercoaster

'Where's my horse?'

'This is what Jack and me have managed to create so far...all you have to do is add your poop to the top and we have a field record!'

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

"I could do that."

Vaudeville producers audition a singing Canada goose.

"There you go with that typical police mentality."

'We do not do belly rubs, if that's what you are looking for.'

'I'm a guard dog too.'

'Yeah, the carrot helps, but coffee is what gets me going in the morning...'

'I'm going to be a little late.'

'I know you like your stallions tall Mary, but a clydesdale?'

'I fell off the wagon, again... meat wagon that is.'

Inappropriate horse whispering.

Never clip him yourself unless you are an expert.

'You want to stick that thermometer where?'

Unsure of the correct answer, Teddy looks around and then discreetly pulls out his cheat sheep.

"Then I realised, I was just a child substitute."