Horoscopes Gifts

'And now over to Mrs Miggins for our financial forecasts...'

'If you had been born two days later you'd have been kind and clever with a great sense of humour.'

'There's a flaw in your experimental design. All the mice are libras.'

'Here's mine, water dominates, dress warm as you enter a chilly phrase...'

'A lot of rubbish. We Leos aren't that easily fooled.'

You are no longer in jeopardy.

'I told you I refuse to be born today. I don't want to be Aries.'

'I sense that someone is about to swindle you.' 'Wow, thanks for the warning! How much do I owe you?'

'My horoscope said I was going to make someone happy today.'

'Far out! How did you pick me as a leo?'

"You're a lesbian, how nice, I'm a pisces"

"Libra (September 23-October 23): Busy, busy, busy."

Last night I met an interesting guy online. He's an Aries with a trust fund rising.

Someone with tremendous drive will leave you with a lasting impression.

"Do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, for richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, when Jupiter is in his 6th house or Saturn is in his 2nd, until death do you part?"

'I'll be right with you. I'm reading my horoscope.'

It says, you're going to meet a nice Pisces for a romantic dinner.

Today will start off with an interesting twist.

You are successful in knocking down barriers.

Nostradamus.

'According to this rubbish I'm going on a long journey.'

Consider yourself lucky. Nobody has let you down for days!

Re-explore familiar surroundings. You may come across some fresh, new surprises!

Tomorrow.

'Your stars say, don't have any opinions today, what do you think? I'll tell you tomorrow.'

Pisces/fish

'Happy 2015.'

"Well it's ironic given that I'm actually a Capricorn."

Astrological accidents.

"I'll bet your're a Taurus. Right?"

"For what it's worth, next week all your stars and planets will be in good aspect for you to launch an invasion of England."

"My birthday is actually in September, but I've always identified as an Aries."

"This isn't easy for me. I'm an Aries."

". . . and in the corner to my right, weighing 217 pounds, fighting as a Capricorn with Capricorn rising and Mars conjunct Uranus in the fifth, out of Beaufort, South Carolinaaa. . ."

"It looks like we might all be able do a brunch on a Saturday three months from now."