Hopeful Writer Gifts

"Dear Author: Thank you so much for giving us the opportunity to reject your work."

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

'The C minus was sufficient. I didn't need the advice against hiring a literary agent.'

'I have a best selling novel on the tip of my tongue...'

"I try to write a little bit every day."

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

Great works I plan to complete during the lockdown.

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

'As a famous writer, could you do something to help jumpstart my career?'

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

"Follow that dream!" (man boarding taxi)

I'm writing the Great American novel, one bill at a time.

'This scholarship application is great. You must have received an A in creative writing.'

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

"This is an excellent story, Doris, so far."

"If you saw a book with the title 'An American Speaks Out,' would you buy it?"

"We don't have to worry about being quiet until we're old enough to read that sign."

'I've had a few short stories published, but I'd really like to write 'the Great American How to Write a Novel.''

'Publshing Books for Dummies.'

No animals were harmed during the writing of this book report....

'I can't promise you a best seller but I can give you fifteen minutes of fame.'

"What made you start blogging about success?"

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

The novel was printed and in the stores ... any minute now, the world would beat down his door.

On the cusp of winning the Nobel, Bernie gets exposed by his third grade handwriting teacher.

"One day she'll be a wonderful architect."

'Be gentle with me, it's my first novel.'

"I've finally finished my lockdown novel."

"I called for you creative people because I feel it's time to begin my autobiography."

'Of course creative writing is important. You want to write home for money when you go away to college,don't you?'

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"