Home Decor Analyst Gifts

Welcome?

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

Yoga Xmas Decorations

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"You're welcome."

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

"I don't know the Latin, but the common name is climbing onion."

'I'm not sure which I like best - the fake fire or the fake man with brandy glass in front of it.'

"On second thought, mabe it would look better over there."

'You do realise that's pot pourii?'

"I'm starting to think stripes."

'I can't move in, Ted - your lifestyle is too modern. And your furniture is way too modern.'

"My feng-shui consultant placed Harold in the closet."

'Welcome to the house warming! The map points out what is furniture and what is sculpture.'

Posh Easter Egg

"Hedge-fund managers have to have something over their sofas, too."

'Ooh, hey...real hardwood floors!'

"We want it to look lived in, but not necessarily by us."

"The board is going to have to talk to 5-G again."

"Okay, lady, your new carpet is installed...you can let your dog back in now."

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

"Dave, we need to talk about office props and work productivity."

"You like it? It’s from the MoMA Store!"

"We're looking for something more over-the-couch-ish."

Pea green

"My incentive for losing weight? I bought a fitted sheet a size to small."

King Madras

"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

'Yes,I did bag him from a treestand.How did you guess?'

'I love what you've not done with the place.'

Woman crushed under satin sheets.

"Hmmm. Not sure it will go with my wife."