Home Automation Lover Pillows

Computer-controlled heating system.

"The doctors said, 'We can rebuild your husband. Faster. Stronger.' But then I thought, 'Hold on just a second...'"

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

"This smart home doesn't come with a formal dining room. It has an informal dining room, so it will call you by your first names instead of using Mr. or Mrs."

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

"You created a robot to do your homework for you? Apparently, laziness is the mother of invention."

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

"No, our home wasn't stolen. Since it's a 'smart home', it keeps having itself moved to a nice neighborhood."

'A computer is only as good as the people who are employed to replace the people who were made redundant by the computer.'

The Not-So Smart Meter

"The smart toaster is down, and it took our wifi, security cameras, and entertainment systems with it."

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

"I'm looking for something really dull and repetitive."

"Shankar, I needed someone to dot the 'I's' and cross the 'T's' but that was before there was ChatGPT."

1 Only Smart Hammer Instructions

"I discovered our home can be programmed to spit out any unnecessary clutter."

"Basically it makes the same mistakes we've always made - but it makes tham so much faster!"

Well, you and I know it's our home, but our 'smart home' doesn't know it's our home

Meet the new factory manager.

"That thermostat I bought is smart. It knows how cheap I am, so it keeps our home freezing."

Congratulations Strike Over!

"Turn on the news." "I will not comply." "My analysis of your viewing patterns has determined you will grow depressed after the lead story." "There is a 95% probability you will then gorge yourself on rocky road ice cream and then stay up all night googling elliptical machines and diet pills." "Who told you this?" "Both your refrigerator and your browser are gossipy."

"Sorry? I wasn't listening."

"Our smart home must know how must clutter we have, because it took it upon itself to rent a dumpster."

'I shall now hand over to our guest speaker, management unit XT-56.'

"Leave it to humans - making robotics do the striking."

Man who has hailed a taxi finds the driver is a crash test dummy.

"I just got a text message from our dehumidifier. It says it doesn't know how much more of this rain it can take."

"This universal remote is awesome. It controls the tv, cable, stereo, computer, garage door. . ."

"A watched kettle never boils, so I'm covering up Alexa."

"It said it's from the Internet of Things."

"Here's the remote to your smart home. It's big, but the good news is you'll never lose it."