Home Automation Pillows

"The blender just texted—we forgot to turn off the stove."

The Internet of Things

"Artificial intelligence has gone too far. The refrigerator just texted that the dishwasher is talking behind my back."

"Yes, our dishwasher is a smart appliance. But, you still have to actually put the dishes in it."

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

"I swear- the next one of you that beeps at me is gonna be sorry."

"I synchronized the complete household with the computer and the smartphone. Now I don't have to feel lonely when nobody is at home because I can talk to the loo."

"When I said I wanted socks, I obviously meant I wanted a multi-room sound system with voice activated management."

"Question ... what is my motivation to ever leave this armchair?"

"I think our 'Smart TV' might have overheard us..."

"It's a smart refrigerator that requires a password to open it. They always use one of our names. Their lack of creativity has finally caught up with them."

Robot Washing Up.

'With all these mega mergers between electronics and telecommunications firms, I just got an obscene email from the toaster...'

Please Swipe Your Feet

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

"A watched kettle never boils, so I'm covering up Alexa."

"I'm charging my smartphone."

"Sorry? I wasn't listening."

"My smarthome just sent me a text saying it's a mess, so it doesn't feel like having visitors right now."

"This universal remote is awesome. It controls the tv, cable, stereo, computer, garage door. . ."

"The toaster is sueing the sandwich maker over custody of the bread..."

"Unfortunately he's just not smart enough to set them up!"

"Three remotes have gone missing. It's like some remote-eating gremlin lives in our home."

The Not-So Smart Meter

My House Is Smarter Than Your Honor Roll Student

"Life is so much easier since I brought the XL Robovax for Clive."

"I love this device! Not only does it answer questions, it also works out for me."

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

"I'm beginning to regret ever having a smart meter fitted!"

"It's a smart toilet...after my husband uses it, the seat puts itself down!"

"The energy company sent us this new 'Smart Meter'."

"Here's the remote to your smart home. It's big, but the good news is you'll never lose it."

"Are you sure you have everything wired correctly? Every time you try to change the channel, I hear the toilet flush."

"I asked my investment advisor for something that was low cost, easy to manage, and also functions on its own. He suggested an index fund or a robo vac."

"Alexa. Just talk to me!..."