Holiday King Gifts

'I prefer to do absolutely nothing on holiday....otherwise the shock's too much when I get back.'

"That's it lads, 364 days annual leave...what would we have done without our union!"

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

Happy kids running abount with a 'Schools out' banner

"Excuse me, but for some reason you have us traveling with our kids."

"Do you remember, Peg—are we on our way out or on our way back?"

'It's a blonde, long-legged species with a melodious voice and it goes south for the winter.'

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

Camping-Pong

'I thought this was supposed to be a holiday.'

Lounging by the pool

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

'I am not doing nothing ... I am perfecting inertia.'

It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas

'See you in two weeks!'

Skier and his dog.

"Here's to East, West, South and Bridgehampton, and all the little Hamptons in between."

The Old Lady Bobbing-Around-In-The-Ocean Classic.

Ice Cream Tower.

'Did you say psst?.'

"Actually, it wasn't so bad. One minute I was standing in line at the slaughterhouse...The next thing I knew, I was being basted in my own juices..."

'Research shows that while the number of surfers is somewhat constant over the year, there is a sudden increase in casual bathers over Summer...'

'Santa is the delivery man, I'm the CEO. Do you know what a CEO is, Lisa?'

Hair of the dog spots: christmas jumper

Nanny with children on leash

"Trick or treat?"

"For keyhole turkey carving we use a 12 mm port in each flank and third in the midline."

'I think I'll go somewhere warm this year.'

Thru The Eyes Of A Lifeguard.

"Have you packed everything into your smartphone?"

Santa, alien, easter bunny and sasquatch plan the perfect caper.

A pilgrim driving a camper leaving the Mayflower ship.

Blowing out the Christmas Pudding.

"My mind is still on vacation."

Not a Creature was Stirring