Hockey Haggler Gifts

'They're renegotiating their contracts with the team owner during half time.'

"You just had to book the economy cruise, didn't you?"

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

'Never accept the first offer, always hold out for more.'

Young costermonger trying to sell to a gentleman.

Ticket machine costing an arm and a leg.

How much for a blueberry scone? $3.25. I'll give you $1.20. Huh? $1.40. $1.45. It's not negotiable. Shrewd. $1.65. $2.00. $2.10. $2.25, but I want free shipping! Ebay addicts. $3 for your sandwich. $6.

"The forty thousand dollars includes a rear view mirror!"

"He's refusing to pay the inflationary bits"

"How much if I pedal?"

"Tia Carmen! We're at Plaza Mall...not Flaco's Flea Market!"

Man about to pay his hospital bill notices a team of doctors and nurses waiting to resuscitate him.

"Actually, I forgot to subtract the disinterest."

Map for directions on a hockey rink.

"Apart from the NDA, we have another option before signing a contract."

"All the government wants to do is push our buttons!"

'Look, you still owe us 17 cents.. if you sweep up my office we'll call it even.'

'Well, yeah, the hot dog is 10?, but the BUN is $3.40.'

'The child's seat is worth more than the car.'

"More proof there's an afterlife."

'I'll tell you where I bought the murder weapon in exchange for immunity.'

"But I might be interested. How much are you asking?"

'Are you sure you want to bargain with him?'

'You say that if you sell me it for £50 you'll be giving £100. In that case give £50 and keep it!'

Donald Came Out Of The Recovery Room This Morning But Had To Go Back After Seeing The Bill.

'Okay, £60,000 a week AND a ticket for the London Olympics.'

'It even has tiny for sale signs on the windows.'

"No more hockey for you, mister, until you learn to control yourself!"

Ice hockey player with testicles on his stick.

OK, OK, you can have it for a nickel, but I won't go a cent lower. Maybe.

I lie to my dentist about how often I floss. I also lie about what parts of my body I floss.

"I'll go shop around for a doctor."

No Reasonable Offer Refused

"Dad, for Father's Day, I'm giving you $100."

"Look what I just bought! The price tag said 25 bucks but I got it for 30!"