Historical Humor Fans Gifts

Servant Painting Targets Around Arrows Shot by a King

"You're why I have the moat, Mother."

Message on an arrow with a 'P.S.'

Robin Hood and His Merry Men

'I appear to have upset the animal rights lobby.'

'The Marshall of the Edna Badlands valued comfort over speed any day.'

The Children's Crusade - 'You give the boys cooties, we'll give the girls cooties - we're back in a week.'

'Howitzers at dawn.'

'If you're going shopping, collect some taxes on the way back.'

The Bikings

"We're following Carrot Top."

"You're on a what?!"

When laundry ruled the waves.

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

"The peasants are revolting Sire."

Romeo & Juliet & Ron

"Bonk!"

"Perhaps it wasn't so wise to bring Frosty along!"

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

PHARMACY, 'Tell Hippocrates to write his prescriptions in Greek -- I can't read Babylonian!'

Young costermonger trying to sell to a gentleman.

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

"So who ordered the 'Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum on a dead mans chest'?"

"They got me for pillaging. How about you?"

Inventor of the Tudor spirit-level

The Algonquin Round Table

'Your Majesty, the peasants are out of bread!', 'Then let them eat low-carb stuff.'

'Yes, the colours are wonderful. But he only does five pages per month, and he doesn't support PostScript.'

"If Noah asks... Just tell him you've all had your vaccinations."

"You ever get the feeling the posse's starting to lose focus?"

"C'mon. Just one more round of funding and I'll build you a horde that'll knock your socks off."

'Too cheap to buy me real flowers, huh?'

Carl Wilhelm Scheele: "There was a great display of ores and minerals...I could not write with a molybdenite pencil."

'Huh, that Will Shakespeare, a man of few words.'

"We brought him into oversee our millennium menu...he did such a good job on the last one"