Hipster Humor Fan Gifts

"I'm looking to downsize..."

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

You want me to be a what? A hipster. My research shows caf

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

"Pizza sounds wonderful. Italian, Greek or Hipster?"

Emergency Hipster Beard

"Yuppies! There goes the hood!"

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

Normal Beard vs. Hipster Beard

'Wilson, this company needs to be better in touch with today's youth. Pierce your nipples and have a report on my desk by Monday.'

"As your new CEO, I hereby change 'deadline' to 'soft squiggle.'"

"Brooklyn is the Manhattan of the other boroughs."

Gangsta wrap.

"You know what they say: if you're tired of London, you're tired of organic soy latte and pop-up vegan yoga festivals..."

What your guitar says about you.

White Flight. Beautification. Gentrification. Plain Old Rich.

Hipster Police Department

"There you go bra. Double flat white and homage to Rothko's Seagram series."

"Give me something that shows I'm hip AND fiscally responsible."

"I've got something in what used to be a decrepit, run-down, unfashionable area."

"No, we don't have field to plate provenance for each bean."

"I think you're beard needs a trim..."

Unlike modern day hipsters, pre-historic hipsters didn't need to rely on yoga, hiking or even rock climbing to stay fit...

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."

The Inventor of the Man Bun.

"It's all good – but some of it is better."

"Just remember, when he says 'indie' he means Indianapolis."

Cars.

"... And that's an 18-pound piece of tofu I shot at Whole Foods."

Hipster Coffee

"Not moonshine - small batch, artisanal grain alcohol."

"Sorry, but it's store policy to remove man buns by any means necessary."

"Something a little different this time or would sir care to look like a dick again?"