High School Completion Gifts

Good Luck in your Exams.

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

Toy Shops and Educated Children

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000... Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000...

National Academy of Sport

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

Department of Nanotechnology

'Why not take some time off after high school...travel a bit...get a job...make some money...pay your own way through college.'

School holidays

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

'The Prom Dress: One Week Later'

"How was prom?"

Highschool sign.

'Son, you can cancel your plans to backpack across Europe after graduation. See? Your father put up the old pup tent instead!'

'It may not be a great report card but it beat the street expectations.'

"Homework! Homework! Homework! I'll be doing this for hours! Talk about a misspent youth."

Morton's pride was understandable. He was the first in the Pinhead Family to ever graduate.

'Of course I'm depressed. I've run out of places to pierce.'

"Well, team, we've been officially disqualified. You can come out of there, Tyler."

"No, when I said I dropped out of school, I meant I fell out the WINDOW."

'That's Friday, Ed.'

"My essay is titled Essay: Educational Tool or Tired Cliche?"

'It's just a casual job for the summer.'

"If you have to ask, you can't afford it."

High School

"The extent of your extracurricular activities in high school, may very well be participation in regular program of oral hygiene using an effective decay preventaative tooth paste, but that won't get you into a good university."

'Kids, if I'd gotten into computers, instead of baseball, I'd have a job now!'