Graduating High School Gifts

Exam Questions Foretold

A basketball match

'...I'm taking 9 months off between the end of the summer hols and the start of my gap year...'

'I'm at that awkward age when I can't read my own handwriting. Do they teach penmanship in college?'

"Did you know that people with four-year degrees earn twice as much as people with high school degrees?"

The SAT test can wear you down.

"Have you given any thought at all about where you might like to accrue your student loan debt?"

"Studies show that children of immigrants are more likely to to take advanced math and science courses and more likely to take advanced placement tests in preparation for college."

'Of course I'm depressed. I've run out of places to pierce.'

Spring Breakers! The Resort accepts 18 year olds!

"So, according to law, we're basically hostages till we're 18."

'That's someone who's halfway between childhood and adultery.'

"Papi, will I be the first in our family to go to college?"

"You see 'The Man' devised this shrewd plan so more people can go to college and become doctors and lawyers and stuff. Now that they're 'productive members of society,' revolution is the last thing on their minds! I plan to make that my doctoral thesis wh

"Higher learning gets higher each year."

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

"My parents are going to pay for my education but I'm on my own for any attorney's fees."

"I need to call the school nurse. My grades have fallen and they can't get up."

'At least you won't have to worry about the rising costs of a college education.'

'Their parents aren't going to be very happy with one of their predictions. They discovered that when they're ready for college, tuition will be around $18,000 a year.'

'Right after high school, man, my life went straight to video...'

'Why not take some time off after high school...travel a bit...get a job...make some money...pay your own way through college.'

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

'I can't wait to turn 18 and move out to public housing, go on food stamps, get my own Obamaphone, draw unemployment, get Obamacare, and enjoy my life!'

You can tell which seniors got accepted early admission! West Fester High School.

Can't you put away your cell phone? Just seeing if Nick's at the prom already. U there yet? Almost!

It's true your father did get a 4.0 in high school. Of course, that was on the act.

Next semester I have "The Frito-lay

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

"I'm afraid there's just so far you can go with street smarts."

"We're going to sacrifice you to the gods, son, because it's so much cheaper than college."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

'I have this fear of the real world...'

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference