Hibernate Humorist Gifts

Bear: 'I can't sleep, so I'm going to rustle up mid-February snack.'

Ice Cream Surgeon

Welcome Spring.

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

'On second thought, let's try it the other way around... My head on a lion's body.'

"Suddenly, you’re a fan of New England stone work?"

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

'The funny part is that the aerial was fine -- the TV set was just unplugged!'

'They're being damn noisy in the hospitality box next door,'

'I'll set snooze for an extra month.'

'Pink isn't EITHER the new black!'

'It feels warm enough to me.'

Fire hydrant with regular or sparkling water

Mary Margaret, the best bar nun.

'Actually, it's good, old fashioned, chicken soup.'

'I, Dom Perignon, will now uncork the very first bottle of Champagne. Of course, I'm just guessing this is the right way to do it.'

'Thyme heals all wounds.'

"Oh, no, no, no, no! Please, NOOO!"

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

"What, exactly, did you say to the maître d'?"

Public toiletsbathrooms for dogs using fire hydrants in cubicals.

"Hibernation - here I come..!"

'Your ten percent tip.'

Lady Liberty's Self-Care

"At Hooters I'd already have three compliments on my tie!"

'Lovely soup, just like my mother used to open.'

'What a bargain!'

"Apologies for the delay. Your eggs Benedict should be up soon."

"The doctor's running late. Feel free to catch up on your binge watching with our waiting room TV."

'Waiter, there's a fly in my soup.'

'I'm sorry, but the soup of the day was just tripped over by the employee of the month.'

'That pest in 453 is being discharged.'

"It's alright for you - I'm a fictional character."

"Back from hunting with nothing again?"