Heavenly Lounger Gifts

'It's quite lovely - Just like sleeping on an air bed!'

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

"Gimme a large cheeseburger, regular fries and a diet root beer!"

Two old superheroes on a park bench feeding the birds.

Blue Stockings

'She'll never look for me here.'

"I am dressed for the job I want."

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

"I'm thinking this might e a good area to set up base camp."

Unabridged Dictionary

Sick person curled up at home

'Where does cozy end and tepid begin?'

"Writing that book was a real strain."

The only creation God was truly proud of was the Sabbath

"Why did we wait to get recliners?"

'How can you bear to sit around doing nothing? You're right, I think I'll have a nap.'

'I'm able to live the American dream by getting paid in Euros, running my business form an offshore tax haven and getting European style universal health care.'

"Sorry Honey, I'll be about thirty years late for dinner tonight."

'No idea. He's been there for as long as I can remember.'

'I'd say the couch is contouring a bit TOO much to their bodies.'

"I love the smell of unemployment in the morning."

Champagne and Oysters

'We've run out of one-man plays - why not make it up with the rest of the drama group?'

"As a frequent flier, you'll be entitled to stay in our airport lounge for up to a week during delays."

Rest distracted by moles.

"You have reached the samaritans. If you are a farmer press one, a pensioner press two, small business owner press three...."

Giraffe and mouse reading books: 'All Things Great' and 'All Things Small'.

"I really should have paid attention to everything I learned in Kindergarten."

"Hi! Are you enjoying the peace and quiet?!"

"Sleeping in?"

"Now bend forward to touch floor between feet- try to keep knees straight."

Kangaroos in book shop. Sign reads, 'books', 'pocket editions'.

"In this country, son, anything is possible, including you going out and getting a job."