Heavenly Fairway Lover Gifts

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

Golfing Bishop.

Golfer hanging from tree branch to play difficult shot.

'Lost your ball again?' - 'No, I've got my ball. I've lost my club.'

"Getting the ball in the hole on the first swing is good isn't it?"

'No,silly-I asked for a sand WEDGE!'

"On the weekend I finally beat the club pro...so I don't need you anymore!"

'Yes, Mr. Osborne, this is an intervention. Your family had no other choice. Golf is an illness...'

"Oh no, it's gone in that silly little hole again."

'Two please-and I mean TWO boats!'

Tee for Two!

'This has to be the longest course I've ever played!' (Sign with Gas/Food/Lodging Next Tee)

Golfers lost on the road

I warned you to keep it low!

"I think I see your problem...You're standing too close to the ball"

'Well done, Evan; you only missed a hole-in-one by 7 strokes.'

'That takes you into double figures and we're not off the tee yet!'

'I don't know what these things are, but Master spends a lot of time away from the house with them...'

'Whenever Ralph finds a golf ball he puts it in the basement.'

'Did you see a ball come this way?'

'Thanks, but I know all about the Dogs of the Dow. My problem is I end up with them, instead of starting.'

"'Smoking' or 'Non-Smoking'?"

Welcome to Fairway...The town with 536 holes of golf!

'What a divot?'

Golf

'My name is John and I'm a golfaholic!'

"Well. First of all, your stance is a little wide."

"Mind if we play through?"

'One of the quickest ways to meet people is to pick up the wrong ball'

'It's a nice course. I just wish it wasn't so close to the airport.'

You are not permitted to accept physical assistance when playing your shots...

This Sportsman is 'Playing Through the Green'.