Heavenly Court Jester Gifts

'Any chance of a plea bargain?'

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'How about a game of cards?'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

TV jester.

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"I say we move on to dessert."

Justice 4 Ron

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

'They named special prosecutors to investigate each other.'

Basketball.

"Another slander suit!"

Portrait of a Serial Attorney.

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'

'It's all just an unfortunate misunderstanding, Your Honor, it was 'Talk Like a Pirate' day, and,,,,'

"Someone should have warned you - he doesn't suffer fools gladly."

'Radford, go in for Bloom. ... Uh-uh-uh! Finish your vegetables first!'

'The score is tied and we've only got a 20-second timeout, so we've gotta be quick. ... I'm 'X'. Who wants to be 'O'?'

"It's either this or a country run by lawyers."

'Yeah? -- Well, there's a thin line between being a strict constructionist and being a stupid jerk!'

"I'm working as fast as I can, Mr. Sims. There are only so many billable hours in a day, you know."

"I told you we should have had separate trials."

'What are the chances? I mean, all 10 players simultaneously dive for a loose ball and conk heads?'

Two lawyers in a royal court

"Thank you, Nathaniel. I think you, too, are a very scary young lawyer."

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'