Health Procrastinator Gifts

'Your horoscope says stay indoors and keep your mouth shut.' - 'I'd better cancel my dentist appointment.'

"Maybe next week when I'm feeling a little better."

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"I did my report on time travel, but my dog ate my homework in the future."

"Honey, I can't go to the gym today. I feel too out-of-shape."

"I'd rather eat your homework."

Serious Putty

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

'1001 things to do whilst waiting to get on the internet.'

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

'I forgot to do my homework so can we plow into a snow bank on the way to school?'

Good luck in your A Levels.

Studying and technology

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

'My arms are getting shorter.'

"Have you ever had one of those days when it would have been easier just to do some work?"

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

"I was all set to go to the gym, but you'd be amazed how much, yoga class and pour-a-glass, sound alike."

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

Obedience school was tough. Especially the homework, which he would do and then eat.

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

Al, The Go-From Guy

'Busy Dear ?' 'Just watching my exercise video.'

Easy chair exercise machines

'Hey, boss, what's a 7 letter work starting with 'w' that represents what I should be doing rather than solving crossword puzzles?'

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

Invaders from Planet Manava.