Health Junkie Gifts

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

Gym workout.

Woman with exercise bike

A man is living in small box apartment trying to read a book, but is surrounded by people engaging in noisy activities.

'Is this still America?'

"You ordered the organic, unprocessed, whole wheat spaghetti?"

"I just reached 1000 jumps."

Internet Cafe

Health

Apocalliptical

'Kids, let's pause and give thanks to that higher power that keeps this family together...our internet service provider.'

'I'm all talked out. Let's look into some gene therapy.'

"Offering free Wi-Fi was genius."

'Stay tuned for a surprising new health study regarding...'

'If you had a tapeworm, would you keep it?'

'All I'm saying, Sweetheart, is that maybe you're not quite ready for the advanced yoga class!'

'I'll have a two mile run, 150 sit ups and a side of weight training.'

'I haven't read the health columns this morning. Is coffee out or in today?'

'Triglycerides? Let's just say when your cholesterol,HDL and LDL are partying it up, he's the guy you want to gate crash!'

Crisis at the health club.

'It's the word MODERATE which scares me!'

"That's what I like about you, Abrams, you don't let a little illness keep you off the job."

Rudolph the red nosed reindeer reading 'lightweight gift ideas' magazine

"That makes me very happy!"

'I take it that when you went on your 'spot reduction' diet, this wasn't what you had in mind?'

Weight Loss Clinic.

"How long? I stop when I start to smell like bacon."

'No, you can't count an extra olive in your martini as a serving of vegetables.'

'Like lambs to the slaughter, my ass.'

'I'm sorry, but there are now 16,000 medical jounals, and I no longer have time to see any patients.'