Health Journey Ponderer Gifts

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

'Almost everything I have hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

Begin this high fiber diet slowly. Too fast and your co-workers may complain of a greenhouse effect.

"My diet plan for you is if it tastes good, spit it out."

'Barb had her stomach replaced with a mouse's stomach to help her eat less.'

"Push harder - I still can't see the scale."

"Would you like me to give it to you straight or sugar-coated?"

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

"Grandmother, what big diastolic numbers you have."

Dieting Motivation.

'Looks like Shelia has overdone it with the cream scones this week!'

"You're just a shell of your former self. You need to improve your diet."

Women holding onto birds so that her weight seems lower

Your problems are all in your head, Al. This time you're wrong, doctor. I happen to be lying on my keys. The problem is not in my head. It's in my left buttock.

"I’d like to return my Fitbit—It won’t stop calling me a lazy piece of sh*t."

"We're looking for a 5000 step walk."

Ed finally had to admit that his body was less of a temple and more of a worn-out parish church with a bouncy castle out front.

Scales

Attack of the 'health' foods

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

''Exercise'? -- But I hate to eat and run!'

'Ask your doctor if getting your fat butt off the couch might be right for you!'

Obese man using a exercise machine. His false teeth are flying out.

"Dear Diary... I've stopped smoking, and I'm sticking to my diet."

"Until we get more employees to join, we'll just have to roll with the paunches."

"My brain said, exercise....my tummy auto-corrected that to, extra-fries!"

'I've added a few minutes to that hour glass figure I had in school.'

Gym. Whatever weight I manage to lose here I always seem to find on my way home. Donuts.

'I see you've managed to cut your coffee consumption in half.'

A woman stares at a birthday cake that has "4,000,000 calories" written on top of it in icing.

"We just made a big cancer breakthrough. Have a cigar."

'I want you to slow down, and that includes fast food.'

Exercising in Confinement

Confined by Coronavirus