Health-conscious Sipper Gifts

The Guy Who Invented An Alcohol Substitute

"Fred read red wine has lots of benefits including a longer life!"

Recreational and Medicinal Wines

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

'Sparky, fetch me an impudent little chardonnay.'

We'll have Manhattans...

"Try this new IPA I just finished. Let me know if the malts and hops are layered like last week's batch." "Bailey was a really 'good boy'."

"You had me at alternative milk."

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

"I'm off, I only popped in for a swift three units."

"This wine tastes like a**....Bring me every bottle you have!"

Velvety. And so was the wine.

'It's funny - I'm a Bourbon, but I've always preferred Scotch.'

"Wine not?"

"May I say, sir, the staff and I just knew you'd see through that Beaujolais."

Football fans in corona times

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

"I'll just have a Diet Coke. I'm in the middle of my novel."

'I feel totally connected now that I can order liquor and attend meetings on the internet.'

The youth shows responsibility!

"Are you looking for 'drinks and nibbles' beer, 'I don't really drink beer' beer, or good old fashioned 'gidday mate' beer?"

Walking here to the tavern allows me to decrease my carbon footprint and increase my bourbon footprint.

'Too acidic? On the contrary, I find it well balanced.'

"Persistent, well-rounded, and full-bodied, with hints of smoke, and just a soupdon of irregularity."

The professor had developed a product that would change the world forever.

"The great is $54.99, and I do have a near-great for $23.99."

"Don't worry, she's still alcohol aware."

Acme Instant Muscle Ade Machine

"I want a wine that's wise but unassuming, and not ashamed of a screw on cap."

"It says here that having a glass of wine is good for you."

Global warming finally hits home. . .

'I'm into natural foods, Joe -- give me a martini with a soybean in it.'

'Pub drinking games with bottled water may be sensible, but they're bloody boring.'

'What did we do before green tea?'

'Give me a whisky without ice, we should all do our bit.'