Healing Humor Gifts

'I only got up for a drink of water, and a queue's formed next to my bed.'

"Let the healing begin!"

Self help acupuncture

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

"Sometimes I wonder why I spent ten years at medical school and another 20 honing my skills..."

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

'The funny part is that the aerial was fine -- the TV set was just unplugged!'

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

'If it doesn't itch, why worry?'

"I don't leave home without it!"

'I'm sorry, Louis. I should have warned you that I installed a speed bump in front of the refrigerator.'

'Feel free to get a second opinion. I can give you the number to my mom.'

"Things look good but let's run a few more tests since mortality runs in your family."

'Actually, it's good, old fashioned, chicken soup.'

"I think you may have your gown on back to front."

'Thyme heals all wounds.'

"The doctor will now glance in passing at you."

Doctor's poker.

'I told you nothing was out of joint but your nose.'

"I'm afraid that's a wrap for this session!"

'Yes doctor, it did hurt when you did that!'

"If I don't think it's going to work, will it still work?"

"...and how about you, Wellington? Does this smell funny to you?"

Bog of depression.....'Can I come in ?'

Oh, oh... I detect traces of tree nuts... where's my epipen?

"YOUR mother? - Let me tell you about MY mother...."

'I should warn you, I charge double if you want me to examine both of them, Mrs. Jacobs.'

'When I die could you preserve my liver for medical research? You've done that already.'

Bob's mother drove him crazy - but at least she came to visit.

Be careful how you unwrap it I think it MIGHT be his stool sample!

'I'm referring you to a doctor with better attorneys.'

"He's our newest partner, we can't afford to be as selective as we used to be."