Humor In Healing Enthusiast Gifts

'Thanks for not letting cancer define who you are.'

Self help acupuncture

'Believe me, Mr, Hart, Laughter really is the best medicine,'

Clown Cheering Up Patient.

'The funny part is that the aerial was fine -- the TV set was just unplugged!'

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

Traditional vs alternative medicine.

'I only got up for a drink of water, and a queue's formed next to my bed.'

'Feel free to get a second opinion. I can give you the number to my mom.'

"When you're ready, I'm going to stand on my hind legs, and lick it better."

'Actually, it's good, old fashioned, chicken soup.'

'Dr. Federson has performed this procedure so many times, he could do it blindfolded with one hand tied behind his back. Show him, doctor.'

'Thyme heals all wounds.'

"If I don't think it's going to work, will it still work?"

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

Oh, oh... I detect traces of tree nuts... where's my epipen?

Bog of depression.....'Can I come in ?'

"Let the healing begin!"

"Ok, here's another one about antibiotics. . ."

"Race you to the spleen!"

"It's cooties."

"Don't think of them as fleas. Think of them as your entourage!"

Chicken soup is in an intravenous drip.

Man about to enter a therapy session, with the doorbell showing a 'depress' sign.

'I've got it in pill form, but for really fast relief from panic attacks...'

Ah ha! Surgeons remove shopping trolley from patient.

"I believe doctors write too many prescriptions, Mr. Martin. I'm writing you a sonnet."

'Oh, great! Now I'm depressed too!'

'The swelling well receed in a few days and the racket should slide right off.'

'It's hop,hop,skip,rattle,rattle. Remember, the second rattle is the difference between curing jungle fever or just relieving the patient of uncomfortable gas.'

Get well soon.

'Tell the doctor to take his time -- I'm feeling better already.'

Acupuncture Treatment Room. My acupuncturist used placebos on me today.

'For fever, we scrape the bark from this branch, boil it with shreeded leaves, and sprinkle in powdered root. Then, just to be sure, we add some antibiotics.'

"He's comfortable."