Header Specialist Gifts

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

Danae's Career Plans: 'The major product manufactured today is punditry, so I'm honing my argumentative skills to work my way to the top of the blow hard industry..my goal is to become a spin ninja...'

"All this spinning...shouldn't this be charging our phones or something?"

'And at what stage did you realise the ball you were heading was on the TV?'

"Gifted class, indeed! One is gifted in science, but can't rad - one is fixed in reading, but won't even try math..."

"I believe it took a team of twenty five, working six months at a cost of �250, 000 to come up with that."

"I've tracked our GPS coordinates over the past week dad. Well, we're roaming the plains alright!"

Good Luck!

Pole Star

'And don't be afraid to ask for directions.'

A house being demolished in order to make way for a road widening scheme, with the occupants being evicted.

"Hibernate sounds better than binge watch."

"Sorry we’re late, but apparently the journey of 1,000 miles begins with 'I know a shortcut around this traffic'."

Daredevil. No. But it's been months now. I wanna talk about it. Well, I haven't watched the last couple episodes yet. Blasphemy! You have one job as a modern American consumer of Netflixian entertainment: and that's to binge-watch every episode the day the series is released. Sorry, little buddy. Some of us have lives. What's that supposed to mean?! Careful what you say around seniors. You'd never be man enough to handle a good Price is Right marathon! You distract it while I make my escape.

Soon The Moon Will Have Cellphone Reception Better Than That One Part Of Your Commute

You're Here. Man, You Really Look Like An Idiot!

'Sorry, Big Guy, We're downsizing, Here comes your replacement,'

The company relocated - didn't they tell you?

"You never used to visit me, but since I had satellite t.v.installed, it's Rapunzel, let down your hair! Rapunzel, let down your hair!"

"Actually, when I wangled a transfer to the Los Angeles office, I expected palm trees and ocean."

"Sky, sir?"

'...you say my electronic submission carried a virus that destroyed all the hard drives in your company?'

Algebra Research Center: Come In We're Slopin'

Rafael Nadal

Man to mechanic: 'Whever my wife is next to me, it pulls to the right.'

'Wow... Here comes 'Holy' Andy Jones, king of headers!'

'We're launching a billion-dollar space mission. We need a name. They say you're the best.'

'In two meters turn left!'

"I wanted you to meet our colon specialist before we miniaturized him."

"Oh wait, we need to be on the 1-9 North bound escalator to get to the food court."

After his football career, Bobby 'Header King' Grunz found a satisfying new job.

"Just a heads-up...binge watching Netflix together is not considered quality time."