Hardware Shopping Gifts

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

"He's having a hard time finding work."

"Just one more site!" "I'm totally, like, in control!" "I can quit anytime I feel like it..."

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

Hardware and software

Axle greaseMarine greaseElbow grease .

'The program is stupid, primitive, embarrassing, and boring. I want to buy a new telly.'

Home De-Po. Things you need for your project. Things you didn't know you needed until you were halfway through your project.

'Have you got one of those things you use to knock nails in...?'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

'Better buy one now - before they make them too big to fit into your house.'

Kevin had a computer virus.

Not all service desk staff were pleased about the new bring your own device policy

"Dad needs a Phillips screwdriver. Who's Phillip?"

'I can watch T.V. shows on the computer, so who needs a TV?'

'Computers' 'Hardware' 'Software'

'He may not be accurate but he's resourceful'

"I think these may be counterfeit bolts."

'It's an old work injury.'

'Useful Drywall Screws' next to a huge box of 'Useless Drywall Screws.'

'Do you have any duck tape?'

Female nail has been hammered in. Says to male nail: 'Sorry, I have a headache.'

Widescreen TV.

"Alfresco Plumbing & Hardware Supplies"

'I'd like you to meet the saw, the hammer and, well, you know the drill.'

'Let's watch 'Remember the Tightens!'' 'No! I want to watch 'I Love Loosey!''

Flat screen TVs and 3D TVs.

Stud Finders: 'These don't even work!'

Hardware Store. Do you have any fans? No, I'm not all that popular.

Ironmongers

Power and the Glory tools

Witness Protection Program

'It's about to restart.'

'Oh, we're just here so Rusty can shop around for a new fence to dig under.'

"And where did you get the idea for your screwdriver, Mr. Phillips?"