Handkerchief Collector Gifts

'Here was proof that Lawrence was indeed an Englishman."

"It was better before God took up knitting."

Pashminas are sooo noughties!

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

Stuff: You Don't Really Need But Still Don't Have.

"Look at their faces! What did they expect? They never visited her! Of course the will says her money goes to the cat shelter. . ."

'I love shopping for clothing I don't need with money I don't have.'

"My scoop-back tank comes in Mango, Morning Glory, and Scallion. Don's Maori surfers are available in Iris, Mustard, and Prawn."

"I often consult with a higher authority... my grandmother."

Football supporters.

'I don't know about this new computer inventory system. It just ordered a thousand left handed four fingered surgical gloves.'

"Now now, what have I told you about using your zombie knife at the dinner table..."

Bureau of alcohol, tobacco, firearms and other neat stuff.

"One fine day my son, all this will be yours."

The last of the Mom and Pop brokerage houses

Signed Baseball - Scientists,

Pianist.

Neighbourhood Snatch Area.

'Don't worry, if you buy it, you don't have to wear it.'

Don't you like it, Dad?

Retail store: 'put this on and shut up!'

"Look, Gwen!...Beak warmers!"

What if...Hankies were as big as table cloths.

"It belonged to my great... great creepy Uncle Edgar."

Antiques/Collectible/Bric-A-Brac/Garbage.

Bad Outfit Alarm.

Swiss excalibur...

Campaign for real beer bellies.

Surgeons using a Swiss Army Knife.

'I don't know what it is but those tusks would make beautiful knife handles.'

'There's nothing wrong. My hands are cold and I left my warm gloves in the tractor.'

"Mom! Are these capri pants, or did I just get taller?"