Handbag Humorist Gifts

'It appears he hit an iceberg.' (A LETTUCE)

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

Mall Directory: You aren't here x - where the heck are you?

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

The mysterious Sherlock Holmes - 'Is he wearing his cap backwards or forwards?'

Emergency Hipster Beard

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

"Sorry, you're only allowed one carrion."

The Dandy

"The one time in our lives when it's acceptable to run around naked, but they dress us up like L. L. Bean catalog."

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

"Trust me, detainee orange is going to be huge this fall."

Flight Socks.

"Wow! That's an amazing welding project!"

"I found an old photo of us, when we were punk rockers... Didn't we look ridiculous?"

On the catwalk it looked elegant and sexy! What happened?

Man watches a cat enter a pet door to a "V.I.P. Lounge" in an airport

Gangsta wrap.

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

"I think you're beard needs a trim..."

"You know what they say: if you're tired of London, you're tired of organic soy latte and pop-up vegan yoga festivals..."

"Give me something that shows I'm hip AND fiscally responsible."

Hipster Police Department

Cat scares away fish design on man's shirt.

'My husband, Bill, works at the airport - I still haven't opened my birthday presents from three years ago.'

"Arr! This isn't the map to the treasure, it's the map to me winter sweaters."

"... And that's an 18-pound piece of tofu I shot at Whole Foods."

"Lemonade App: $1"

"I'm thinking of waxing my back."

'Let's face it, we're not meant to wear hats...'