Hallway Patroller Gifts

"Darren Eggleston. I saw that!"

After a day long meeting, the decision, as usual, is made in the hallway.

No caption. (Man wearing a cast is in traction. He imagines sheep lining up to jump fence. Sheep also wear casts.)

Shirley Temple...The later years.. - 'Animal crackers in my poop...'

"But I wasn't running in the hall."

Cleaning Lockers.

"You are here, but you should be in class!"

'I don't suppose you're just writing me a Valentine?'

Speed Limit Enforced from Aircraft.

'Mr. Franklin. What did I tell you about wheelies in the hallway?'

You observed me speeding? Are you familiar with the Heisenberg uncertainty principle?

"Ma'am, do you know how well you were driving?"

"60 may be the new 50 in the fantasy land you live in, but here in the real world, it's called exceeding the speed limit."

"I'm sending you to someone who's less squeamish."

Mega Corp. Last Rest Stop for 37 Doors.

'His insurance company said it does not cover self-inflicted accidents.'

Teacher's Lounge

Traffic Court

Beware of Curmudgeon!

"Well, I should probably go—work's really starting to pile up."

"Sir, have you been drinking, not drinking, drinking, not drinking, drinking?"

D.O.T asks a dog driver:'Where's your trainer?'

'Do you know that your pilot's license has expired?'

"The custodian's job is 10 percent janitorial and 90 percent as my bodyguard."

Low Tech Automated Speed Enforcement.

'I don't need to go to a gym. One of my classroom management strategies is to circulate frequently around the room. I figure I walk three miles a day.'

Speed Limit Enforced by Slow Aircraft

'Notice how much everyone slows down since we put up that sign?'

'A fag end, and at the fag end of our shift! Let it lie.'

"Hold on—I forgot to stamp your hand."

"Let me guess - your gas pedal stuck."

Traffic Department Worker Pruning Traffic Lights.

Amazon Obstacle Course: Online Shopping Gamifies Your Building Entrance.

Speed Reading Class.

'Why don't you look at ME that way?'