Halloween Humor Enthusiast Gifts

That's some scary SHIT!!

Things that are not so scary. . .

Transylvanian backpackers.

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

"Home depot."

Dead Funny

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

Night of the Zombonies.

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

Woodpecker carving pumpkins

"I said slime."

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

"The Monster Mash wasn't just about having fun. We were protesting Vietnam."

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

Zombies.

"It's probably just seasonal."

"You're ruining our reputation, Bob!"

"Of course I'm dressed like a cheap w***e! It's Halloween! Duhh!"

"800 years old?!! - Gosh... you must be feeling very 'long-in-the tooth."

"Alexa, play Thriller by Michael Jackson."

"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."

Macbeth: Take Two

'Hey, what am I, chopped liver?'

Open House of Horrors

"Same goash-darn thing every full moon, eh, Mr. Harper?"

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

"Where can I find the lefts?"

"Its been on the market for over two years. The estate agent reckons it's something to do with negative edibility!"