Haircut Hilarity Gifts

"My barber sneezed."

Express Barber Chair for Chemo Patients

"Absolutely not!"

"I actually had this haircut before I became a mom."

Military style hedgehog

'Of course I want a short back and sides. I've only got a back and sides.'

"...and yes, you did take too much off the top!"

Operation Chrome Dome.

'Dwayne deeply regretted not placing his mother in a personal haircare home earlier.'

'Daddy! Are you using the number forty clipper?'

'Just the usual, thanks.'

'You went for the highlights then?'

Amino acid. Shampoo with amino acid, I said, not battery acid.

'Mom, Dad... you're right, it was high time to see the hairdresser!'

'I use that to check for combovers.'

'You can't cancel a summit meeting because of a bad haircut!'

'I have a proceeding hairline. It runs in my family. . .'

BARBER

'His mother wants to know if you'll give him a haircut after you remove his tonsils.'

"Just a little off the top and shape the back."

"You're a barber. Think of your portfolio as a haircut.... in two weeks it will look better."

Mutant Moontunes - Fringeless Nigel

'Since we were first married, I vowed I'd never let Jim see me slopping around in the mornings with my hair in curlers!'

"Well, from what I heard, he was a dog-groomer before he became a shearer..."

'Read about Samson & Delilah. . . Better yet - see a live demonstration.'

Obvious Comb-Over: Please Give.

"...and how would sir like it?"

'You wouldn't be so quiet either if you had to sit on this board!'

A man with a unibrow sneezes and the unibrow becomes his moustache.

"Just take a little off the top!"

"Let's go for a crewcut to salute our tremendous military."

'All finished. Just the way you like it.'

'Come back later -- he's grooming his successor.'