Guys' Weekend Gifts

Joe's 'Talent-Optional' Karaoke Bar

"Tonight I'm getting together with pals to sit around and croak."

"Gracie, I'm proud of you. Your team lost, but you tried your best and that's all that counts."

Clubbing

Playing cards.

Thank God It's Friday.

'I'm looking for male bonding, but I'm a little rusty.'

"Your shout!"

You have had enough

"Hey. We’re in the doghouse every night. That’s the beauty of it."

GPS, satellite dish, cell phone...nature awaits. All right, Pop. Nature awaits!

"I don't mind you spending the weekend at the lake with the boys, but don't push your luck by bringing home fish."

"Let's see now - have we got everything?"

'The wife loves to go dancing Saturday nights.'

"Can you believe it? A couple of page-turners, one affair, and, wham - it's Labor Day."

Wide screen TV

''Fancy a quick pint?'

A Revolution In Formal Wear! The Cummertie in Four Classic Styles!

"Hey! He must be watering down the beer.This is our fifth pint and we're still not talking rubbish."

Next Round indicator

"Combining our favorite pastimes of drinking, fishing and hot tubbing makes me realize... we should stop drinking."

'Pint of Binge, please. . .'

Topless bar

'Thank God it's fry day'

"Mind if I have the guys over to watch some poker?"

"The drinks are on the house, lads"

'You're clean, sober and unhurt? Poor darling! This Friday night with your buddies must have been REALLY boring!'

Great party - thanks.

Thank God it's Fry Day.

Beers

'Online dating is rubbish. I've written to 20 women and not ONE has replied.' 'At least you're being spurned in the comfort of your own home.'

"This is the night Marvin gets together with his online poker gang."

Nerds night out: 'Dibs on Designated Driver.'

'Excuse me, Miss, are you spewing your guts up responsibly?'

'Thank goodness it's Friday!'