Gutter Giggles Gifts

Help! I'm caught on a pinsetter and I can't get loose!

The Busy Gardener

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

"Judgement Day: Division Four"

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

"Garden variety allergies."

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

Hardy Annuals

"Hello Mr Flower. You've got a pretty face. But your feet are filthy."

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Yard Sale

Beginning Yarder.

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

"What are you in for?"

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

Garden of Eden and scrumping

'...and this is the water garden...'

Balding gnomes

'Where are you going?'

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

"They always fall for the old 'high-impact yoga' trick!"

I'm going for former flower children. Tree's Tree Nursery. Legal pot. Legal grass. Festuca. Carex. Miscanthus.

"Are you trying to show contempt for this court."

'He never listened to his mother!'

'I wish to refer you to a tree surgeon. You have all the symptoms of Dutch Elm disease!'

Now THAT, my friend, is a beer garden!

Technical Terms Explained: Suckers.

'I'm not making a mess, Mom -- I'm becoming one with the Earth!'

"I used to have A Green thumb but it was mainly for hedge funds."

'There goes the squeak in your brakes, Mrs. Ferguson.'