Tree Giggler Gifts

'It's going to be hard to get lost in these woods!'

The Busy Gardener

I was holding out okay, until he made it into crumb cake.

'Why don't you just pull over and let them pass already?!?'

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

"This is bishop’s weed — always pee on it. Tell your friends."

Hardy Annuals

"Garden variety allergies."

"Hello Mr Flower. You've got a pretty face. But your feet are filthy."

STRIP Hambone: Computer company job interview

Get on with it!

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Beginning Yarder.

Yard Sale

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

'You can come out, Marmaduke. I was just kidding about putting lipstick on you.'

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

"What are you in for?"

Fancy a pint?

Garden of Eden and scrumping

'...and this is the water garden...'

'Where are you going?'

I'm going for former flower children. Tree's Tree Nursery. Legal pot. Legal grass. Festuca. Carex. Miscanthus.

Balding gnomes

Garden Talk - "I've decided to do some muck spreading."

Magazines layout Christmas issues months in advance so a woe of cartoonists is struggling to draw Christmas gags in the July heat.

'He's wearing a toupee.'

'I wish to refer you to a tree surgeon. You have all the symptoms of Dutch Elm disease!'

"I'd like me first word to be profound, but I'll probably panic and blurt out 'Mama' like every other baby."

Technical Terms Explained: Suckers.

"I now recognize the basement was a bad idea."