'I'm still working on the mystery of how to make a decent living with a tip jar.'
Guru Wannabe Gifts
Gift the dream of enlightenment with our range for the guru wannabe. Whether they're just starting out on their spiritual journey or experimenting with new philosophies, our playful and thoughtful items celebrate their pursuit of wisdom and self-awareness. Celebrate their quest for inner peace with products that are as fun as they are meaningful, perfect for inspiring a little enlightenment every day.
'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'
'I don't give advice. I'm only up here because it's safer.'
'I'm sure I could lie on my back waving my feet in the air if I could play the saxophone.'
"Next, I'd like to play 'Guantanamera.'"
How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.
'It's normal -- Enlightenment freaks a lot of people out.'
'Now, until you've attained perfect wisdom, you'll have to learn to evade questions.'
Sport, Political, Religious and New Yorker Cartoonist Gurus.
'Come back in two months the meaning of life can change, depending if the market is bullish or bearish.'
'I don't offer any free advice anymore. I am offering a self-help seminar and a motivational coaching program online.'
"Things will get bad... then there will be an election... then things will get worse."
'I'm with the band.'
"I'm referring you to a specialist."
First you say I should "know thyself" and then you tell me to extinguish my ego!
'I know it looks silly, but they say his prophecies have regained their old accuracy.'
Family Barbecue
'My guru thinks you're nuts.'
Do not ask if you are truly hitting yourself. Rather, ask why are you hitting yourself, why are you hitting yourself. Guru Brothers.
"Ohhh... He's out all right!"
"The Great Source keeps afloat, along with a little help from the sharks there."
Wisdom for dummies
'I'll be in Florida for the winter, but I've sublet my cave to a pair of nice Mormon missionaries.'
"It's worth a try! Maybe someone up there knows how to fold a fitted bedsheet!"
How to win Genius Grants for Dummies!
"I am a ninja rabbit. I am stealth personified. I am one of the unseen. I am now invisible...Darn."
"Don't patronize me. Nobody cares what I think anymore. Go ask Dr. Phil."
Saving up for lessons.
"Sorry - just getting back from a guru retreat."
School of Meditation. They put me in an accelerated class --- My mind is already empty!
There's no way you could have attained Nirvana already — you don't even have hemorrhoids yet.
Dial-A-Prayer and Dial-A-Mantra
"Excruciating boredom, my son, is the beginning of wisdom."
"Whoa, whoa, big guy with all your ‘meaning of life’ mumbo jumbo—I just want my kid to pick up her room."
Next Wise Man Please.
Guru Wannabe Gifts Collection
Guru Wannabe Mugs
Explore our collection of mugs for the guru wannabe—each one designed to inspire and amuse every morning.
Guru Wannabe Pillows
Discover cozy pillows that bring a smile to your guru wannabe’s space, blending comfort with a touch of wit.
Guru Wannabe Prints
Find inspiring prints that celebrate your friend’s journey to enlightenment—perfect for their meditation nook or workspace.
Guru Wannabe T-Shirts
Check out our playful t-shirts for aspiring gurus—wear your spiritual attitude with pride and humor.