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"So how does that eightfold path get us back on the Garden State?"

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

Killing A Guru

'Hey! - Don't you meditate when I'm talking to you!'

"In the Game of Life, my son, the fix is in."

Tartine

"And this song goes out there to any girl who might consider sleeping with me."

Carmel Buildings, Portman Square: A temperance meeting.

"Tia Carmen, is it okay if my study group meets here tomorrow?"

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

Decorated officer - 'And these are for keeping my pants up.'

At the 2021 Religious Games

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

Best Before 5th Pint.

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

Dynamite little combo

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

'The secret to great wealth and spiritual contentment? Ok, hold on...I think I've got an app for that..'

Life on Earth - The original chat room.

"Apparently the Ebola virus can make your ears bleed."

"Whine and cheezed party."

"welcome man cave."

Guru.

Quiz Night...

"I seek enlightenment - and a way to outsource our company's tech support."

'Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard.'

'Wish you wouldn't cut your nails at bedtime!'

'On second thought dear, I think it's your turn to make breakfast.'

How's my enlightenment? Call 1-800-Nirvana.

Tangled Earphones Support Group.

"If I had known how adult her place was I would have brought nicer beer."

Robert Schumann

"I was a weirdo in this town before anyone even heard of Comic Con."

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

'Could you guys play a slow number so my gal and I can dance?'