Gunfight Joke Lover Gifts

"Watch yourself, stranger. I've got an itchy trigger finger."

"Why didn't you simply open the window?"

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

Draw!

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

'Oh yeah. He's the fastest in the west alright. The fastest out of town, at the first sight of trouble.'

Daisy had the fastest udders in the west field.

'I'll teach you to call me a cowboy builder! Go for your gun!'

'Stay back from the edge. Remember what happened to the last angel that fell.'

"At the last minute, his personal physician always intervenes."

'Well, yes, I guess so; the Warmington AR-20 could drop a man at 500 metres.'

"Say your prayers, liturgies, Tefilah, Daily Salat, Sacred Mantra, Ritual Incantation or the secular affirmation of your choice, Varmint!”

'Donut shop is down the hall to your right - and I'm not answering any more questions without my lawyer present.'

'What do you mean you don't rent helicopters?' (Santa shot all his reindeer)

'Abe knew that 'Black Jake' was deliberately trying to draw him into a gunfight, and there was nothing he could do about it'

'Long time no see, 'Slim.' I'm guessing you're not as fast as you used to be.'

Big car with machine gun poking through window, bumper sticker reads: Yardie on board.

They decided to settle out of court.

'What the hell d'ya mean 'shoot straight'?! Whaddya think I'm doing?!!'

"You need glasses, Roy."

"We still don't have children. He's been shooting blanks."

Bang bang - Cowboy.

Cowboy.

"Good news. We're the hundredth caller."

'Don't worry, he never misses ... except when he's been drinking, like tonight.'

"O.K., fellers, we shoot first, then Q. and A."

"Yep, we sure shoulda heeded that sign."

Shooting Leaves

Arsonists anonymous. Petrol can in case of fire.

"That's not what I meant by cover my ass, Henderson!"

Please adjust your dress before you go out shooting.

And so ends the short and very unsucessful career of Billy the Gunfighting Mime.

1. Iran... 2. Iraqed.

Skirmishing in perspective