Gun Store Clerk Gifts

"I want my gun to really scream, 'Look out-he's got a gun!'"

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'Sorry sir,but we can't just take your word that the boots leak'

"It's felt to be his most thought provoking work."

'There's too much corruption in the third world.'

"Hurry up with that dictionary!"

"Not much in the way of loot, but we got a ton of store credit."

'No, I'm afraid we don't have calendars in dog-years.'

'Take it easy, the textbooks will be here. It's only August 30.'

'Democracy, okay?'

Self-Improvement, Self-Empowerment, Self-Aggrandizement

"Your receipt is also available in a choice of colors."

A man sitting in the grass reading

'We couldn't give away black-and-white TVs until we started advertising them as having 'non multi-color capability'.'

"Do you have anything else by the same author?"

University Book Store.

The Appearance of the Gatling Machine-Gun in 1864 caught the world by surprise.

"...And our 'Holiday Scented' candle smells just like credit cards."

'I want to return this wallet. I can't seem to keep any money in it.'

"We don't see ourselves as either a David or a Goliath. We're content to just be the company that manufactures the sling shots."

How much would you take off for cash?

'Guns Galore Inc' 'Prolong your Life'

'We will conduct the background check. Our fortune, Madame Zula, will conduct a complimentary future check.'

'You did want him wrapped, didn't you?'

European Arms Proliferation - 1860's

"Do you carry any shampoos that have been tested on little kittens?"

Arms Industry increases sales by 8.5%

"My company sells military goods and information to unsavory characters around the world, and donates 100% of our profits to local charities!"

Clown applying mustard to balloon hotdog.

"The only think we'll be able to shoot at soon will be that right to roam lot..."

"Because it's got a goddam crack in it, that's why."