Gun Shop Owner Gifts

"O.K., but let's say you have up to six hundred intruders per minute."

'It's not for hunting. I just want to be able to protect my family from deer attacks.'

"I'm looking for a sense of security and piece of mind in a short-recoil-operated, single-action semiautomatic."

"My gun's in the shop. Let's establish a dialogue."

'The N.R.A's Written Test for A Gun License.'

"What the...hey, it's working after all!"

'This one is a repeater,a repeater,a repeater,a repeater.'

"Careful with that window. The safety sticker says 'open windows can be hazardous.'"

"I'll knock 10% off if you promise not to hurt anybody."

'Would you like to try a sample, Sir?'

NRA Convention

'Will that be 'smoking' or 'non-smoking'?'

'Yes,I did order an extra barrel,but for my shotgun.'

'This was owned by a little old lady who only used it on door-to-door salesmen!'

GUNS: 'Fireworks are against the law, kid, but if you're 18 I can sell you an AK-47, which makes a hell of a noise.'

'Mel's Metro Mortuary' next to 'Ricichetrama, America's ammoland'

'Guns Galore Inc' 'Prolong your Life'

Fido's begging days were over.

'We will conduct the background check. Our fortune, Madame Zula, will conduct a complimentary future check.'

Gun shop owner dies from arrow in back.

"Since the cracked down on gun licences there's some bleedin awful shots about!"

'Yes,I did order an extra barrel, but it was for my shotgun.'

'There ought to be background checks before people can vote.'

What?

"Of course, in those days they weren't so much interested in blowing people away as in just shooting them."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

Cut Price

"Freudian, Jungian, Adlerian – none of it compares to retail therapy."

"This is a clever little shop. It makes you think it would be fun to own a lamp."

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

Sale.

'Don't worry. I'm not charging you for the extra lettering.'

"If there's any one lesson we've learned from the eighties, it's how to shop!"

'I'll take it!'