Gum Guardian Gifts

"O.K., I'm going to demonstrate the proper way to lie to me about flossing."

Dentist Training School.

'Doctor, instead of removing some teeth to save the gums, how about removing the gums to save the teeth?'

"Oh no! It's the militant wing of the Dentists' Union!"

"Careful...she bites."

'Harold, when was the last time you cleaned the pool?!'

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

Garden Gnome fishing all the fish for pond.

'What's wrong with our new shed? Nothing - I'm sat out here guarding it.'

Mental Wellness Center. Some folks coming here are working on multiple issues. Earlier, I saw a germaphobe with a fear of flying. Using an airplane bathroom must be completely out of the question! There's a narcissist with math anxiety and a fear of public speaking. He hopes one day he can stand in front of a large audience and count all the wonderful qualities he believes he has. And that guy has claustrophobia combined with a fear of success. Looks like he's going through a rough period

"Did I show you my new climbing hydrangea plants, Mr. Fessler?... Mr. Fessler?"

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?

Bumble Bee

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.

'You see, we don't have any children, so he's kind of our baby.'

Biodiversity

"This chicken wasn't cooked - it committed suttee!"

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

'I'll just put them here until the danger of frost passes - probably next April'

'Come on, Walter, you're wasting out time! Stop using complete sentences!'

The new global mantra flag for the future

A drooping plant is watered via an IV tube.

'No spell-check?? And you call this HEAVEN??'

"Plastic straws. No fish were spared in the making of this product."

'Thank god for the spellchecker!'

'It works all the time: Light a candle and dinner comes to you...'

'It feels like I'm very much in a good place these days. That is, aside from the grammar.'

'I prefer the term 'mobile home'.'

"Relax. They're just crows."

"Reading social media, I almost miss grammar, spelling and punctuation"

'The boss just chewed me up and spit me out...'

This might take a while

"Grammar-police, sir, we have some questions about your online posts and the inappropriate use of apostrophes."

"Whoever dug up my carrots had better learn to play dead, fast."

'No, Kevin -- there isn't any margin of error on spelling tests.'