Guilty Pleasure Ponderer Gifts

"Psst... You could always buy another lunch at lunchtime."

Extreme Sisyphus

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

'Remember that outfit, Miss Wilson, that you said you wouldn't be seen dead wearing?'

A couple decides what to watch.

Man In The Stocks Used As A Clock

'You got twenty years for hunting without a license? Kind of stiff, isn't it?'

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"

"I'll bet a lot of people wish they had a royal palace to return to."

Golf escape.

"It's my day off."

"At this time boarding first will be all first class passengers, a.k.a. the more important people on this flight."

A Donut Ride Outside of a Police Station

"...And I cheated at solitaire...twice."

'Hello, yes, I'd like to order 200 packs of the sweets you can eat between meals.'

"Oh, swallow your pride and go to the eye doctor!"

World Meat Consumptiom

Hunter haunted by Bunnies.

Shoplifter behind a barcode.

"If you're as smart a refrigerator as they say you are, you'll keep your mouth shut about this."

'Sure, but king benefits aren't portable.'

Wet Wipes: My Guilty Secret

"Having a fine old name really has been enough for me."

The Food of Shame.

"You should do a sermon on the dangers of stupidity."

"How do you feel about plea bargaining?"

Corporate Ladder

"Always wondered what happened if you tried to drive through without a card."

REPLACING THE BURGER TANKS AT MR. BIG'S.

"Remember to take into account my client had no life coach."

'I got 5 years for something I didn't do. I didn't run fast enough. . .'

Quarantine: The great equalizer

"Putting a steak, chicken wings and potato chips on a salad kind of negates the eating healthy concept."