Guest Host Dynamics Gifts

"I think they're trying to tell us we've stayed to long."

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

Cardiac Recovery.

"Sorry, that's not my table."

'So much for your theory that mixing two 50-point-rated wines equals one rated 100.'

"Can I tell you about a few items that aren't on the menu?"

'He was hosting a business dinner for 300. Those were his last words.'

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

"This is a little awkward, but you've been our guest for a while now, and we all have work in the morning..."

"My client greatly regrets the incident with the carving knife. However, in her defense, 14 people were coming for Thanksgiving and her husband, who had just one job to do, bought only 8 rolls."

'Tea minus one hour thirty minutes and ten seconds.'

"I'm having friends over for dominoes, so everyone needs to clear out of the kitchen."

"A table in Siberia, please."

"No. I wouldn't 'like to see the cheese menu'. And I don't appreciate the stereotyping!"

"You have reservations for 7 o'clock? Ideally..."

"This should be cozy. Just let me know if you need an extra sousaphone."

"Smoking or nonsmoking?"

"Afterward, there will be a short Q. and A. that will be just long enough for one person to take up too much of it."

'The Boss is coming to dinner tonight - please don't open a can of worms again.'

Compulsive Christmas Caterer!

Come dine with me!

'Just decaning the wine, Dear; I'll be in, in a sec. Someone's at the door; and oh, yeah, the dog needs to be let in.'

"I'm hanging tough, guys, but have I mentioned how much I resent you for always making me hold the table?"

'What if someone says 'everything is not alright'?'

'Give us a good table and we'll leave plenty of bones behind.'

"A table for two? Profit or non-profit?"

'You just had to tell them to make themselves at home!'

Trustworthy Authority.

Stephen Fry

'We'd like a quiet table for 47.'

Alan Carr

"Methinks the hors d'oeuvres are ready."

"I beg your pardon, but a mustache is required in the dining room. Would you like us to provide you with one?"

'Main Street or Wall Street?'

The partisan cafe